Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize