If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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