she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
