I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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