So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
