so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Someone came in the potted fern
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
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