I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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