yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
My pussy is not your playground.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Randomize
