Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
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