Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
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