were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
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