Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(224): View more from Illinois

Awesome. Ask her out.

(815): View more from Illinois

Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.

Fav 14 855 1948
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(203): View more from Connecticut

sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube

Fav 11 1977 2488
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(914): View more from New York

End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.

Fav 75 6826 1540
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(443): View more from Maryland

this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing

Fav 23 6366 1891
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.

Fav 3 3529 951
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(785): View more from Kansas

As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.

Fav 7 901 646
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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend

Fav 3 718 875
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(239): View more from Florida

Is Oprah even human

Fav 2 357 385
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(609): View more from New Jersey

My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now

Fav 0 27 13
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