I want to have your abortion
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Randomize
