Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
