what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Randomize
