He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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