I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Randomize