Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
