This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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