what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
