summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
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