He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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