Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
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