I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
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