Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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