Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
