If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize