Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(516): View more from New York

See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil

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(714): View more from California

so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one

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(618): View more from Illinois

College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.

(1-618): View more from Illinois

This is true but you can't really get fired from college

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(817): View more from Texas

I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.

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(908): View more from New Jersey

Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.

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(803): View more from South Carolina

Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out

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(785): View more from Kansas

You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...

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