Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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