I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Randomize
