she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
