dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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