i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
