Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I can text with my tongue
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
