happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
