I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Randomize
