Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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