i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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