Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
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