like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
