You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Terrible idea I love it
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
