thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
