So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Randomize
