Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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