she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Just pee around me
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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