They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
