Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
