I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
