Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
