I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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