I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize